Recent polls indicate Barack Obama is lagging behind John McCain with a critical segment of the U.S. voting public. This group is not women over 50, Latinos, military veterans, Native Americans, independant voters or Arkansas Hillbillies. No, the group he is losing cuts across all spectrums of the American public.
Pet owners heavily favor John McCain because he has lots of pets. John McCain's menagerie consists of Sam the English springer spaniel, Coco the mutt, Oreo the cat, a ferret, three parakeets and a number of saltwater fish. Obama on the other hand owns no pets. A definite "pet-gap" has developed which could be critical in a close election.
So far Barack Obama has merely promised to get his daughters a dog after the election. His advisers, however, realize the potential danger in this "pet-gap" and are currently trying to close it. Obama campaign workers are now discreetly visiting both Petco and PetSmart stores to collect as many animals as possible.
Close advisers within the Obama camp have spoken on condition of anonymity that so far they have acquired 5 dogs, 4 cats, 2 cockatoos, 6 parakeets, 3 rabbits, 3 chinchillas, 4 painted turtles, 2 Red Boa Constrictors, 1 very nasty tempered tarantula and a three foot alligator that keeps biting workers when they feed him. The plan is to have all these pets on the stage with the candidate when he gives his acceptance speech in Denver. It is felt that this event will not only close the "pet-gap" but actually allow Obama to surge ahead and leave McCain in the dust.
Of course there are risks. For instance if the alligator was to bite the candidate the Secret Service has said they would have no choice but to shoot the gator. This might cause a backlash among owners of reptiles but Obama advisers feel it is worth the risk. The "pet-gap" needs to be overcome at all costs.
Pet owners heavily favor John McCain because he has lots of pets. John McCain's menagerie consists of Sam the English springer spaniel, Coco the mutt, Oreo the cat, a ferret, three parakeets and a number of saltwater fish. Obama on the other hand owns no pets. A definite "pet-gap" has developed which could be critical in a close election.
So far Barack Obama has merely promised to get his daughters a dog after the election. His advisers, however, realize the potential danger in this "pet-gap" and are currently trying to close it. Obama campaign workers are now discreetly visiting both Petco and PetSmart stores to collect as many animals as possible.
Close advisers within the Obama camp have spoken on condition of anonymity that so far they have acquired 5 dogs, 4 cats, 2 cockatoos, 6 parakeets, 3 rabbits, 3 chinchillas, 4 painted turtles, 2 Red Boa Constrictors, 1 very nasty tempered tarantula and a three foot alligator that keeps biting workers when they feed him. The plan is to have all these pets on the stage with the candidate when he gives his acceptance speech in Denver. It is felt that this event will not only close the "pet-gap" but actually allow Obama to surge ahead and leave McCain in the dust.
Of course there are risks. For instance if the alligator was to bite the candidate the Secret Service has said they would have no choice but to shoot the gator. This might cause a backlash among owners of reptiles but Obama advisers feel it is worth the risk. The "pet-gap" needs to be overcome at all costs.
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